Last week on July 24, I read an interesting article in the National Post (a Canadian newspaper). The author was Linda Blair and it was titled “Holding a Grudge is self-toxic” expert says.
The article goes on to explain that indulging in a grudge and in particular feeling anger can also compromise our health. Experts say the effects can include higher levels of inflammation and susceptibility to chronic illnesses..
I thought this quote from Angela Buttimer (a psychotherapist from Georgia) from the article was especially memorable “When we hold onto grudges and resentment, it’s like drinking poison and expecting the other person to get sick.”
The column recommends that we try to avoid that self poisoning via forgiveness, and understanding (try to challenge your own fixed beliefs – it’s like trying to envision their behavior from their perspective).
Consider explanations for the other persons behavior, and utilize breathing and relaxation techniques to calm oneself and the breathing will assist your better judgement. Even slowing down and taking three slow breathes can centre our thinking, keep us from reacting and instead making a response that shows our better judgement. A proper response can save a relationship.
In my experience, dealing with kidney disease since the early 1980’s, and other events over my lifetime- I can honestly share I tried to avoid resentment, and anger about my health. I was aware to realize that my feelings were oblivious to the other party and I was simply preventing myself from enjoying life.
It was the same with my health, if I handled my health problems with a calm and positive attitude I benefited from a myriad of ways including not isolating myself. I still tried to benefit from the strengthening power of gratitude, I always had much to grateful for.
I know I am not alone in facing trials, and not retaining a grudge is something you already know – holding onto negative feelings is only self stressing, and unhealthy, however I thought the article was a positive reminder for myself and proof that indulging in negative thinking has a physical effect.
While I have a moment, I want to share that the positive messages I receive on my blog are appreciated, and likely having a healthy result also. As I am just barely 3 months from my recent kidney transplant (click for my post), and having good reports, I am doubly grateful.
Wishing us all good mental and physical health. – David